When Sorry Just Isn't Enough

Andrew - Ita Buttrose has a new book out. It’s called A Guide to Australian Etiquette: For All Occasions, From Weddings to Work. Now no offense to Ita, but I went looking for the answer to a conundrum while at work today and found that my particular topic wasn’t covered. Sure she told me whether I should put my arse or my crotch in the face of a sitting person, when passing someone in the theatre. She told me how to behave at a dinner party (note to you: don’t invite me to your dinner party because I don’t behave like Ita) but she didn’t cover the one question I needed answering today. How much fuss should you make if you accidentally spill something on someone?

 The reason I needed this answered was because last night Gusband and I were out with our darling friends AO and Jo-Jo. Happily we were perched judging those around us, when the young girl next to Jo-Jo gesticulated too widely and knocked a glass of red wine in our general direction, specifically at Jo-Jo who was wearing white.

Frantically young girl and her friends started mopping up the mess on the table while Jo-Jo stormed for the ladies.  The staff were fabulous, bringing bottle of soda water after bottle of soda water and providing an ice bucket for said white top to be soaked in at the table. AO, Gusband and I channelled our inner Shannon Lush and promptly phone Mumma T to see what should be done. Apparently we were doing it.

If you don't have a "Mamma T" you need one of these

The ensuing conversation involved whether or not young girl made enough effort or showed enough remorse. Now no offense to Jo-Jo but there is no way I would have been following her into an enclosed room to offer assistance if it was my fault. She has the potential to be a little bit scary and young girl wouldn’t have stood a chance against her.

So we sat at the table with Jo-Jo gently agitating her top in an ice bucket, getting angrier and angrier. As young girl and her friends got up to leave she did stop and apologise once again saying she hoped the wine came out.

My question to you campers is what is the proper etiquette when you accidentally manage to destroy someone’s outfit? And should your reaction have any correlation to how scary the person you have damaged is? I imagine if someone poured red wine on a jacket of Gusband’s he would be very calm and simply ask them to sacrafice their life. Or what would happen if someone accidentally burned a hole in one of Lucy’s Camillas?

Don't go anywhere near her with a cigarette or a candle!

Lucy - Don't come any where near me with a cigarette unless you are offering me a drag!. No scrap that, just don't come near me with cigarettes, you never know how I'll react.
I think the really big question here is, should I be putting my arse or fanny in people's faces (at the theatre, or not, your choice).
I actually have a hole in one of my Camillas, I got it at home, there was no cigarette smoke involved, just the death trap coffee table (another story entirely). Moral is, Camillas are often very colourful & no one will ever know there is a hole anyway (maybe I'm ok with that hole because I did it to myself).
But more to the point, I feel Andrew is attempting to hear how I would react if someone destroyed something precious of mine....Well the answer is simple campers. I would remain calm, but then proceed to crucify you at least once a day in the first week, then slowly decrease the roastings. But rest assured I will never forget & bring the so called accident up for the years to come.
I wish I was able to let go, but alas I'm a bit like an elephant that way.
So my calm reaction surprised me a lot when my sister, cigarette in hand, burnt a hole in my day bed from Bali. Yes, it happened. We were more worried at the time about how Sawusband would react & decided hiding the burn mark was our best option.

As you can see it's quite a hole. ....I am actually surprised that the whole thing didn't go POOF ! up in smoke (Poof, Haha) you never quite know what they use for stuffing inside cushions from Bali. It has proved to be extremely flammable.  I have never seen that look on my sisters face before, she kept on apologising profusely & promised to get me a new one. I said just get the hole plugged up & I will be happy.
Oh & the reason I am telling this story is because after a few weeks of keeping the burn hidden, Sawusband saw it while moving the furniture around.....He coped quite well actually.

By they way Campers, lets not tempt fate to see my reactions when smoke is near my clothing, I am sure I would be rather upset if something happened to one of my favourite  Camillas.