We All Need Straight Mates

Andrew - Straight boys are handy creatures to have around, that’s why we keep them. I guess it is the real reason that girls get married as well. Over the years Gusband and I have had cause to call on some of our “straighties” for all manner of things we can’t (or don’t want to) do. They can dig stuff, lift things and generally get sorted all those things that may end up in us breaking a nail.

Many a time we’ve asked Sawusband to help move or lift something heavy. I still recall the afternoon of trying to get a day bed through our front door and if you’ve been to our house in the last 5 years you will know how well that went, it does look great on our front verandah though.

It took a whole afternoon to transform a swamp in a corner of our backyard into a lovely oasis. Under Sawusband’s watchful eye and instruction we dug stuff up and put in new things. Drills were used as were shovels and even the Divine Miss F was given sandpaper and a paintbrush. Oh the butchness of it all!

I don't know if you can see how level everything is. Thanks Sawusband!

We have a friend who is a arborist so he has been called upon on different occasions to cut things down and climb trees to prune them. Handy guy really. On the above mentioned weekend we gave him a couple of beers and up he went like a monkey wielding a saw.

Another straightie who gets a regular gig is someone we shall call Bald Man. Bald Man is a jack-of-many trades and master of several. One of these trades which we have since discovered he isn’t so flash at is electrical jobs. We blew a fuse once and half the house was without electricity so we rang him and over he popped with baby in tow.

I took over baby-sitting duties and Gusband played electrician in waiting. He replaced the fuse and turned the power back on. The new fuse blew again. Not to be beaten, Bald-Man had some different wire, which he fashioned into what can only be described as a super fuse. The power was turned back on and the needle on the thingy started going mental. The super fuse held though. Good news? Not so much. Suddenly the kitchen was billowing smoke. “Grab a hose,” Bald Man yelled (see where I’m going with his lack of electrical knowledge). No need for a hose as I opened a cupboard and discovered the cause of the smoke. A fire in the powerpoint under the sink. So having blown up our dishwasher turns out we needed an electrician after all. Thanks for your help with that.

Turns out Gusband is as handy as a straight boy when it comes to sanding floors and replacing floorboards. How the hell he came to develop this skill is beyond me. Three rooms to go darling, chop chop.

From this

to this

So having extolled the skills of some of our straight mates I’m wondering how I can convince Sawusband to come thousands of kilometres to build us a fence? Lucy, work your magic!

Campers, we do love them for all the other reasons you love your friends. It's just a handy little perk. xx

Lucy - Oh how we love our straight boys! I couldn't agree more.
When Sawusband arrived home this time the fairies must have been working their magic they had managed to keep all the lights working up until the day before he was due. He arrived & I had 2 lights out. He hopped straight to it, up the ladder, crisis averted!.  The next week a few more globes blew (isn't it always the way) back up that ladder.
I always new they were more handy than just to take out the rubbish.
I live in what we call the coven! I am surrounded by people of the female gender at all times.
I have 1 mother.
I have 1 sister.
I have another adopted sister, who has 2 sisters of her own.
I work with all girls.
Not to mention Andrew & Gusband who we know fit into that category.
So it's a great relief that Sawusband is a bit of a girl as well, he loves wining & dining. He's always cooking & cleaning but best of all he is always fixing things around the house. In the last few weeks he has stained all the wood outside our house (which is no mean feat, we have a lot).

I would like to point out that Gusband may very well have right amount of straightness & gayness mixed  together. Sanding floors is not an easy task (straight boy job), but the eye for detail he possesses in the finished product is fab (gay boy job).

So to all the straight friends thanks for being so handy. we love you all.