I'm A Front Seat Driver

Lucy - The other day I was reminded that everyone has a unique driving style. I was in the car with a friend who I forgot was a total lead foot, it took me by surprise as we went from 0 to 70 in a mere second, then screamed round the roundabouts. My heart was in mouth; thank god we were only going up the road.

I realised I might be a little bit of a slow driver. I don't think I'm a total Sunday driver but nevertheless I'm not a lead foot. I would like to think I just cruised along.

When it comes to Sawusbands driving I just can't help it, I have to comment. No matter how hard I try to keep my mouth shut I can't. If I do however manage to remain quiet for a while, I get twitches in my legs & arms trying to hit the brakes as if we are going to career off the side of the road....Yes campers, I am a terrible passenger when it comes to Sawsbands driving.  

Is it the fact that he would rather look out the windows instead of at the road, YES.  

He tells me he is so good he doesn't need to watch the road.

Is it the fact that he has been known to take off in 2nd gear & prefers to take corners & roundabouts in 4th gear? DEFINITELY!

Has he been known to proclaim how he had mastered the roundabout, and then proceeded to go straight over the top of if. YES, just ask Berza!!!(He has first hand knowledge)

We also can't agree very well when it comes to Navman satellite navigation systems. I hate the voice & I'm sure it sends us on wild goose chases! (We have now changed the ladies voice to a mans voice & I am a lot happier than before, but I still hate them)

I could talk about my bad passenger skills for an extended length of time but instead I will just let you know I make sure I am in control of the keys & drive 90% of the time unless I am feeling very calm that day.

Are you bad passengers campers? Or is it just me!

Andrew - I must admit that I did laugh when I saw this post and it's almost too scary to commit text to blog on this one. Can I just start by saying that I love you and Sawusband dearly FULL STOP.

However..... you pair in a car is too scary for words. Sawusband likes to look at what everyone else is looking at (newspapers, magazines, scenery) and you bitch at him for doing just that. It doesn't help that you are forever turning around to the backseat to show Gusband some new shoe or fancy coat that you have found in a magazine.

My favourite trip was the one where Sawusband wanted to try his new navigating system (Navbitch as she since became known) and you felt the need to tell him we all knew how to get to Sydney, again and again and again. I think at that point Gusband and I decided to put our headphones in and our newspapers up and hold on.

Gusband isn't allowed to drive as a general rule either. I'm a total control freak and I completely understand about trying to hit the brakes from the passenger seat. He is allowed to drive in the big smoke though because he knows where he's going, although get him behind the wheel in Sydney and talk about road rage! He drives like Mark Webber (who I must say I think is oddly quite hot) and thinks that pedestrians are on the roads for him to scare the shit out of.

The 4 of us have had so many trips together that it’s hard to put them into one blog. If I can just remind you of a particular trip when Sawusband went out for a run WITHOUT his phone (which we all know he won’t carry anyway) and without the Navbitch and got lost.

Happy travellers - ON A PLANE

I think at the end of the day we should let Gusband  be in charge of all things travel, Sawusband shall be in charge of all things wine related and you and I shall be in charge of….. ok so you and I will just talk shit but we will be happy with our place in life like we have been for so many years. Oh and lets fly.

P.S - Lucy check your email, Gusband has informed me he thinks we should have our own Vespas in Italy. I do not think this is a good idea!

Much Too Old Too Party All Night.....Who Knew?

Andrew – I’m not 18 anymore, turns out I’m not even in my 20’s, there I’ve said it. I’ve come to this realisation today because I awoke on Sunday sporting a MASSIVE hangover. Gusband and I had a dinner party with 5 friends on Saturday night. A dinner party with adults, what could possibly go wrong?

Gusband’s food was amazing as per, the company was lively and fun and the alcohol flowed freely – a little too freely it turns out. What on earth made us think that we could drink solidly for 7 hours and still wake up feeling remotely human?

My head hurt from the minute I dragged myself out of bed, I felt nauseous all day – compounded by working in a shopping centre with second rate food smells wafting through. I was dizzy and my throat hurt. I was hungover.

Apparently the days of drinking copious amounts of alcohol and waking up feeling healthy are long gone. If I’m going to carry on like a young person I should remember that I will not awake like one.

After work I attempted to ease the pain by having a bath trying to increase the water levels in my body by osmosis. Didn’t work. I thought that as a last resort a hair of the dog was in order but the g&t I made myself felt like it had glass in it. There was no denying it, I was going to have to wait for it to pass. This wasn’t your run of the mill dusty, this was completely and utterly covered in dirt hungover.

I have a friend who talks of being  “of a certain age” I think I know what he means. I’m too old for this carry-on. It takes days to recover and sometimes it can feel like you never will. I wonder how the others were feeling? Some of our guests are older than even me. I know Gusband suffered terribly, he struggled to move from bed to the lounge. Painkillers a must.

Try and learn from my hideous mistake campers. You really don’t need that extra bottle opened. xx

Lucy - There is definitely something in the air at the moment...I too awoke with a bit of a  sore noggin as well.
Is it the moon? No, but I always blame it on the moon
Is it the wind? Apparently not
Is it our age? Couldn't possibly be!!! Or could it.
OMG I think it is.... (That means Oh My God for those of you struggling with acronyms)

We too went out on Saturday night, to a Japanese restaurant that had a dingy Karaoke bar out the back. On any normal evening out we would not head down into the dark depths of any back room, but you guessed it, on this night we got absolutely sauced & thought that would be grand... My head didn't think it so grand the next morning.
I also have decided that you just don't bounce back like you used too. I have noticed that no amount of brushing my teeth is making me feel less like I dragged my tongue up some dark alley.

But fear not campers, I have the answer!!! Long Lunches.... Yes, the long lunch starts at a reasonable hour. You can drink for quite a few hours & still be in bed by 9pm to wake up fresh as a daisy.

Andrew, Gusband, Sawusband & I have always been fans on the long lunch. I recall our first long lunch at a favourite restaurant of ours. We drank, were merry, then messy. None of this was helped by the fact that we purchased a case of wine while at lunch. Then went back to our pad for Cosmo's. Next we proceeded to walk the case of wine (taking turns holding it) all the way (100mtrs) up to Andrew & Gusbands to continue the party.... We ran into a spot of bother when Sawusband accidentally dropped the case. We were astounded at the result, Only one fatality. I must now apologize to the owner of that house. We had to leave the empty case with a broken bottle of sparkling behind. So all you could see was the four of us stumbling the rest of the way bottles in hand!!! Isn't that a pretty picture!

But the moral of this story is we woke up feeling fine.

How was your head today campers?

Why Do We Bother?

Andrew - Every single day Gusband will ask me what I would like for dinner. Isn’t that nice of him? I do wonder why he bothers though as I always say the same thing. “I don’t mind”. Contrary to what most of you think, I’m not a fussy eater, Gusband knows what I don’t like so he never cooks those things and when I do answer with an idea for dinner (just to mix things up a bit) he never cooks what I suggest.

It’s like when you go to the supermarket. The checkout person will always ask you how you are. We all know they don’t care how we are so why do they persist in asking every single person? I answered “shit thanks” once just to see what they would say. Nothing. They didn’t even notice.

It’s like when you pass someone in the street and give them the same greeting, “Hi how are you?” Generally you have passed them by before they have a chance to answer.  Why do we bother asking if we don’t really care how they are?

Come to think of it why do we answer the phone by saying “hello”? Sawsbund can never be accused of that particular greeting though. He doesn’t speak when he answers the phone. He just picks it up. Peculiar.

So the next time someone asks you how you are, wait before you answer, chances are they don’t care.

How are you campers? xx

Lucy -  I must admit at work I ask every person how they are!! but I guess the big question is, do I really care?  Well its a yes & no answer....(of course)..... I do care that they are ok, however  I am unsure what to say when people start complaining about their lives. Yes campers, they have been known to start explaining how bad their day/life is. That's when I tune out &  am really thinking, how much are you willing to spend in store today?

As for Sawusband that is a very true of his phone answering technique. You have to start that conversation if you want to talk to him, especially if you choose to ring him (which is why most people decide against phoning him directly & harass me instead)

I am actually pretty sure Gen Y  (not to put them all in the same box)  are more interested their phones than how someone is. I am now as per, going to deviate form the actual storyline of today....

I work in a centre that has an apple store in it. If you are living in a cave, don't read newspapers (that's you P-Mac) or have not been near a television for the last day; Apple has launched the IPAD 2. Yes, now apparently is the time to get excited. The original IPAD is now obsolete, even though it appeared to be ok yesterday.
They were lined for miles through the centre; for hours before the store would even open its doors to launch the Ipad at 5pm. Everywhere I looked there was fold up camping chairs holding up lazy patrons waiting for their chance to own a giant IPhone which you can't even make calls from.... Not to mention all the old people (my age & older) taking photos, I actually contemplated taking my own photo to share with you all, but then thought better of it (luckily).

When I took a step back to view the goings on I noticed every person was walking around not watching where they were headed but all were staring at their mobile phone screens. I think we are in real danger of not only "not" caring how people are, but not even bothering to make eye contact with anyone.

Actually come to think of it I am sure I have stopped talking so much to Andrew since this blog started. We talk three times  a day as opposed to five times....

Campers, I hope you all go home & speak face to face with your loved ones, don't text the messages through.

By the way Muffin Top is now in the dictionary... a roll of flesh which hangs visibly over a person's tight-fitting waist band.

Don't Do it!

Andrew – I don’t “do” meat with fruit. Everyone knows it. It’s not as simple as just not ordering apricot chicken either I can tell you. So many dishes in a restaurant have traces of fruit through them. Chicken with an orange sauce, currants, pomegranate is everywhere at the moment. Don’t even start me on figs. I don’t do them either. Revolting. Over the years this fussy food issue I have, has moved to fruit in general – not just with meat. I like fruit, I even eat it from time to time. I just don’t like it with stuff. Why do people feel they need to put pears in salads? I don’t even like my fish with lemon on it.

Fig Pizza, why would you?

I don’t do deserts either. I know most people will reel in horror at this little revelation. I just don’t want them. I will never order a desert at a restaurant, maybe a cheese plate from time to time but no deserts for me.

Tim Tam Desert that Gusband made and I didn't eat

Turns out there are lots of things that people “don’t do”. I was listening to the radio the other day and some girl was on there saying how she “doesn’t do watches.” Now I think that is most unusual. Apparently she tells the time with her phone, or the sun.

I also don’t do the gym. I know I should and Gusband goes religiously but I can’t stand it. I’ve joined many times over the years. I go once, remember how much I hate it and then let my membership lapse. I have always ignored those letters they send telling you that they miss you. I’d love to be hot and buff but since I don’t do the gym that’s not going to happen.

P-Mac doesn’t do the papers (unless she’s in them). I find that very frustrating, I often wonder how she knows what’s going on in the world. Facebook probably.

I also don’t do pyjamas in bed. Yep like a lot of people I sleep in the nude. I can’t stand wearing stuff in bed. I get all tangled and hot, I always feel like they are trying to kill me in the night. Doesn’t explain why I own so many pairs of Peter Alexanders though. With my “not doing the gym” revelation there’s an image you didn’t want. Sorry about that.

I also don’t do money. I have no idea what goes on with our finances. I’m almost at the point of having an allowance. Gusband does all that, there’s no point everyone doing the same jobs I always say. I don’t do cooking either, I hate it as you may remember. I clean stuff, that’s my contribution.

Turns out there’s quite a bit I “don’t do”. I think I’ll stop while I’m behind. How about you campers? What don’t you do?


Lucy - There is an awful lot that you don't do, but one thing I know you do "do"  is clean like a mofo... Every time I call you are either at work or cleaning something, therefore I have deemed  that you can't possibly fit anything else in to "not do". 


 I “don’t do” a watch. It’s not that I don’t want to; I haven’t saved enough money to get one that I want, mind you I haven’t really looked very hard (If your reading this Sawusband, I am happy to wear one & would like your input on this, maybe a shopping trip is in order) I also am currently telling time via the sun as well. I know it is a talent that I must bare, I am sure it will come in handy while on our trip.

Sawusband has just notified me that I “don’t do” quiet talk…or inside voice…as well as sobriety…. Thank you for your input!!

Sawusband has also declared that he “doesn’t do” Justin Bieber….I think that goes for most of the adult population. What I do know is that he “doesn’t do” the phone. That’s any phone, home phone, mobile phone, hotel room phone. He hates them; he will only talk to me via the phone because he has no choice (poor Sawusband).

Another thing I “don’t do” as well, is the Gym. P-Mac you are not alone in the paper thing either, I get all my info from Sawusband and of course Facebook Haha.

The most important thing I am taking away from this blog today is that if at any time on our trip away together I need you or Gusband in the middle of the night (such as a stalker or maybe a spider in my room) I should call on Gusband, I might get too much of a fright if you come running to my rescue in the nuddy…. However, you might frighten the stalker or more likely the spider. They will definitely get more than they bargained for…. For the record I will be wearing something to bed while we are away.

Oh and Sawusband just wants me to point out the irony in you “not doing” Fruit & meat together!!

Andrew – We subscribe to a magazine called DNA. It’s a magazine for gay men and often has some great and interesting articles. ALWAYS has some hot, hot, hot pictures – not that that is why we buy it mind you. We like to educate our minds!

This magazine often finds its way to the reading spot in our house also know as the bathroom and all of our friends have commented on it. Many a dinner party someone has emerged from toilet magazine in hand. Girls find it fascinating, straight boys find it uncomfortable.

I wonder what you can tell about people by the reading material they have by their loo? Possibly not as much as you can tell about the people who will bring a magazine from the bathroom to the dining room table.

Gusband and I are a little bit germ-o-phobic (I’m sure there is a real term). We know – and this is my sister’s fault -that if you flush the toilet with the lid open 1 metre cubed will get covered in the germs. Which is why we now keep our toothbrush in a cupboard. Imagine…… Better yet don’t.

You girls are the worst at our house. There is so much talk about men leaving the toilet seat up. In our house the seat is always down. Germs People, germs! Generally I think that men are getting there in the training department. They will more often than not leave the seat as they find it. You chicks, not so much. Always with the top lid up! What is that about? Don’t you know that most people don’t want their toothbrush/hand towel/anything within a metre cubed of the loo, covered in germs?

Taken after I'd cleaned and Gen 20'd

Back to the magazine (sorry to have been distracted. I sound like Lucy in our Thai Restaurant blog) nobody thinks their bits are that big really, yes they have given themselves a bit of a fiddle before the photo was taken, yes we all think they are hot, yes that magazine is covered in germs because and let me make this perfectly clear…..YOU PROBABLY LEFT THE BLOODY TOILET SEAT UP


Lucy - That magazine has always managed to make it into my hands, then out to the dining table, sorry boys, I have definitely been one of the many ladies spreading germs all over your house. (I can see it now, you have just started a whole new generation of germ-phobic people scared of the toilets in strangers houses)


However I always put the toilet seat down but my reason is not to stop the spread of germs. It stems from my apparent belief in Feng Shui. It has a lot to do with luck!! and also that you flush your money down the toilet, so in order to hold onto my limited supply I close the lid (God that sounds hilarious now that I have actually admitted it in writing). 
In fact now I have that sinking feeling that I am about to get side tracked again..... I think Andrew you have opened a can of worms with this DNA blog, I have gone to the book case I grabbed out the Feng Shui book.....

Don't worry campers I promise I will not go off on some tangent today.


Sawusband just piped up & said he even puts the lid down in public toilets. A little paranoid perhaps, (or tight) what do you think?


I miss that magazine. I only ever looked at it for the articles..... Ha ha! 


Do yourself a favour & pick up DNA (or you could just ask to use Andrew & Gusbands toilet) Happy reading CAMPers!!!

Sometimes Travelling Requires a Very Deep Breath

Andrew – Some of you will know that Gusband and I went to the wedding of some gorgeous friends in Adelaide on the weekend. Amazing day, bride looked gorgeous, the wine flowed way too freely and everything was perfect. A delightful end to a fabulous mini-break for Gusband and I. And then…….

Flight from Adelaide to Sydney was delayed, then delayed again and then cancelled. Oh dear. I went off in search of our luggage and left my travel agent husband to sort out how we would now return home. He managed to change our connecting flights from Sydney without any problem (or cost surprisingly) so all we needed to do was get to Sydney. Easier said than done.

Some other wedding guests in the queue before us had managed to rebook seats via Melbourne, since there was now no longer any direct Adelaide to Sydney flights. Turns out they would miss the concert they were going to in Sydney but at least they would be in Sydney. Their new flight was then delayed to the point where they then would have missed their connection in Melbourne so that all had to be rebooked again. Bloody hell what a circus!

When we got to the very lovely girl at the airline desk she informed us that there were no more seats on any flights back to Sydney until the following morning. Luckily we have some friends who live in Adelaide – alas one is interstate and the other is overseas. Handy. As we were accepting the idea of spending another night in South Australia an airline guy lent over to our check-in person and told her there were some cancellations and there were now 4 seats on a direct flight to Sydney. Problem solved.

So one very turbulent flight later and a taxi ride into town to our “last minute hotel” I’m sitting in bed finishing my room service and filling you in. Hopefully as you are reading this, Gusband and I will have caught our last taxis and flight home and be at work.

Surprisingly Gusband and I have had a lovely day travelling together and we didn’t get cranky or upset we just moved ourselves to the bar and ordered a gin and tonic. At that point in time there really is nothing you can do. And as we all know I’m all about the journey not the destination.

So have I come up with any wise anecdotes or tips for handling these type of situations? Not really, I think it’s always good to remember that there are always people worse off. In this case our wedding companions who would arrive 3 hours later into Sydney than us and were then hiring a car to drive 3 hours home. Or the people in the queue behind us who really were going to be spending the night in Adelaide. Or even worse, those many people who are struggling with the aftermath of the natural disasters that Mother Nature is dishing out at the moment.

Ok lecture over….if it will make you feel better to throw a tantrum at a check-in counter or tell a baggage handler to “fuck off”, like I watched one man do today, then go right ahead. Everyone handles stress differently.

If I’m not at work you know the next part of our journey has gone pear and there will definitely be an update.

Don’t take it out on someone who’s fault it isn’t campers, you'll just look like an arsehole. xx


Lucy - There was definitely a lot of planes, trains & automobiles in this latest journey to the city of churches. As I am  writing this you are probably still making your way home.

I especially liked your baby hire car. 

Wish you got a photo with you in the mini!

Sawusband wants to know, did the guy who told the baggage handler to F Off, then declare in big loud voice how he will never return to Adelaide ever again!!!


Back to the important things. I still have one burning question...Did you have to shower over the toilet when you were on the train?


I'm sure all the campers out there are dying to know!

Don't Touch My Stuff, Get Your Own Stuff

Andrew – I don’t like people touching my stuff. Well that’s a bit broad of a statement. I don’t like people touching SOME of my stuff. There I’ve said it. Maybe I’ve got some issues to work through but at least I can admit I’ve got a problem.

Imagine the torment I went through then when a member of the family popped over to use our computer because their internet was dead. I say “our computer” because Gusband and I don’t have his and his things. Everything is “ours”. However, what I really mean when I say “our computer” is “MY computer”. Gusband knows this and accepts his lot in life – I’m in charge of the Mac and he’s in charge of everything else (or so I let him believe.)

It’s funny that you can’t touch my computer but I’ll let you borrow the car. Hell we let friends take the car to Sydney and drive around for weeks in it while we are on holidays. Car yes, computer no.

Now that I think about it I don’t like people touching my phone either. I wonder what that’s about? There’s nothing remotely naughty on there. I don’t have any secret text messages, naughty websites bookmarked or rudey pictures. Every photo on our (my) computer is on both mine and Gudband’s phones and any new ones get updated when we plug in. We have the same apps so basically have the same phone. Not that Gusband would be able to tell you how his updates occur, apparently a fairy does it. Well he's half right.

I wonder if it’s got something to do with the fact that both of these things are usually attached to me, they are like an extra body part. And if either of these things start to look like they might be getting scarily low on battery I start to get very tetchy. Gusband couldn’t care less, he doesn’t answer his phone and most of the time he doesn’t even know where it is.

My base camp in the hotel

I blame the ease of access to all forms of communication for my addiction to these two items. That, my addictive personality and my need to know what everyone I know is doing at all times. It’s scary to think that this blog is making me put out there all the things I’ve been trying to keep quiet about myself. I’m a snob, a gossip, the ultimate consumer and possibly a bore. Come to think about it my friends have known this for ages. Lucky they love me.

Oh, I also drink too much Campers but I think you all knew that. xx


Lucy - I agree with you about all of the above. Yes we all have a problem!! Computers are personal. It's the modern day diary for all girls & girly boys alike.

I can’t stand Sawusband touching my phone for a few simple reasons, he doesn’t know how to work it & never hangs up when finished a conversation, therefore we could be talking after the call & they would be able to hear our every word ….I’m sure you all agree that could be bad!!! Sawusband never remembers to take his phone anyway, but more than that he hates talking on the phone, he wouldn’t miss it if it ever were to be lost.

He is also very generous (like your good selves) with our possessions. However, don’t ask to borrow the whipper snipper or lawn mower; he would rather come over & mow your lawn for you (even if it took 4 hrs) than lend these items out, they never come back the same (just ask him, he will tell you). I use the lawn mower occasionally & I’m sure I never hear the end of it….but then we saw what I did to the lawn the other week.

I lost my phone the other day. It was the first time that has ever happened to me. I am very conscious of where my phone is at all times, so it was sheer panic when I couldn’t find it.  I raced over to mum’s to see if I left it there, no luck. From home I rang it & there was no reception… So I automatically presumed someone had it & I promptly phoned the company & had a bar put on it.

Anywho to cut a long story short it was in the boot of the car. Don’t even ask how I managed to get it lost in there!!! (it could be linked to the drinking problem we both share)

So 5 mins later I’m back on the phone to the provider making them take the bar off the phone. I think we all agree that would be score 1 to the little guy, making the big corporation run around after me for a change.

As for your issues, Yes we all know you are a control freak & are always on a “need to know basis” about everything. You are right though; we still love you anyway regardless of your quirks.

Oh, and you’re not that boring…

Or maybe we both are!

New Thai Restaurant

Lucy - Yes campers, I’m off to a new Thai restaurant that just opened. We need a good local within walking distance of home…. I know it will be hard to rival "June" from my favorite Thai restaurant in the country. 
We can live in hope…
When we lived in the country we religiously visited our local Thai restaurant every Sunday night. We always took different friends with us every time. It was mandatory that we started in the afternoon at our local watering hole & then went to visit June.... Poor June having to put up with us every week.

Even when we went to Thailand with Andrew & Gusband we could not find a Thai Restaurant that rivalled "June's"....

 Buddists are very technologically savvy ...(unlike me)...Who knew!!!!

Love a good phone call....

Whenever going on a trip away with Andrew & Gusband, we always know Gusband will look after us. I remember the phone call came a few days out from this particular trip. Gusband rang & said what insurance do you have.... Hmmm, what insurance? doesn't that just happen....Apparently not!!! Thank God for my travel agent. Never leave home without yours "I Don't"...(he comes on most of my trips or rather I go on most of his).


Any way before we get to the food;

Apart from this mistake Gusband & I made. We had a hangover & I'm sure cheesy fries sounded great at the time!!! not so much..I have never seen fluorescent cheese before!


I'd best show you our accommodation.
Sawusband & I stayed at "Indigo Pearl". It was fabulous.

Our room had a pool & the decor was amazing.

We even joined a cooking school to learn a few new techniques.

The spread we prepared.

So our place was great fun....Next we went to visit Andrew & Gusband's villa 

You know they never do anything by halves!!!!

A pool with a view to die for.

Loved the sunset from their room.

We had time to make a new friend

And do a spot of artwork shopping

Sooo very talented

So I think I got a little side tracked. Back to the food... We went to the so called best restaurant in Thailand....

A little  COCKtail to start..

Some of our food.

enjoying a vino.

The location was fabulous, the food not so much..

Back to reality. Ok time has passed & I have dined at the new restaurant. It was great!!! I am now lucky to have a local Thai within walking distance of homo...I am sure they will be sick of me very soon!.

Happy travels campers!

Andrew - You are too funny. Talk about getting sidetracked. You went from June to Thailand, to travel insurance to cheesy fries.

Just thinking about those fries makes me feel quite unwell. As for the accommodation in Thailand… wasn’t it fabulous!

Campers, when Lucy is talking about “June's” she means the local Thai Restaurant where Gusband and I live that is owned and managed by June. June is a wonderful lady - as all people who know her can attest to. For a long time we had to refer to ourselves as “Lucy’s friends Andrew and Gusband”. Now we are Andrew and Gusband from the Travel shop.

As for taking your travel agent with you on trips… I always take mine so I think it’s only fair that you should take yours as well. Do we know if you have travel insurance for Italy yet? I’ll ask Gusband and get back to you. The Divine Miss C knows all about travel insurance so maybe I’ll ask her…. Better yet I think it may be still a sore spot so  might give it a miss.

Don’t eat cheesy fries campers – especially in Thailand xx

On a Train Bound for Nowhere

Andrew- Gusband and I are currently en route to Adelaide via train. Why? Why indeed? The easiest answer would be that Gusband has never done it before and in his line of work he really felt that it would be a good idea to help his clients.

So yesterday we flew to Sydney to get on the train and off we went. Now never having travelled on a train before (for long journeys anyway) I admit I was a tad apprehensive. As an admitted snob I do not like public transport at the best of times so how was I going to cope for 24 hours?

Turns out surprisingly well! There is much more room than your dodgy old economy seat on a plane, you have your own toilet and shower and you can drink. Perfect. Now I get that it takes a whole lot longer to get to where you are going but that doesn’t worry me, I’m all about the journey not the destination.

So we got to our compartment, Gusband promptly lay down and slept for 3 hours and I had 3 hours of uninterrupted reading – 1 book down, next 1 begun.

Dinner was “Silver Service” which I think is hilarious looking at the demographic who we were eating along side. Silver hair everywhere! Apparently train journeys are for the retired and the foreign, we are the youngest punters on this train by about 30 years.

At the moment I’m blogging from Broken Hill. We’ve been for a walk (we opted out of the coach trip around town) had a coffee and are about to leave for Adelaide.

What’s on today’s agenda? Well I’m reading a book called “The Indignities” so there will be a lot of that going on. Breakfast, then lunch, then Adelaide. I take back what I said about a train trip would be like being locked in an RSL Club, I’m having a blast!

Very much looking forward to a long shower at the Hilton though campers. xx


Lucy -  Well I am glad you are having a ball. I guess this isn't gong to be like "Murder On the Orient Express" after all.
I did always think the Grey Nomads couldn't only be in camper vans. Now we know where the rest of them are.
I did however want to hear more about the sleeping arrangements, didn't you say you were on the top bunk....Yes campers you sleep in bunk beds on trains!
Now back to the important part of the trip, the food, silver service & a bar carriage, I am very romanced by the sound of that, eating & drinking all the while getting closer to your destination.


While you two have been swanning around on planes & trains, Sawusband & I have had a mini break of our own. 
We drove 20 mins up the road to stay in accommodation & go to a restaurant we have been eyeing off for a while.  Now campers I wouldn't blame you for asking why the Heck wouldn't you catch a taxi there & back. The answer is simple we got accommodation at a special rate $99 for a one bedroom apartment that is normally $225 in off peak & a taxi both ways would have been around the same cost.
We stayed above restaurant so we were in walking distance to everything.
The restaurant was called "Ten" it was authentic Japanese. 

You entered through silver doors

We had the nine course degustation menu

There was even a water menu with water from all over the world. 

We went with one from Norway how very Norwegian of us

Crab done three ways (super yummy)

 The toilets were a bit special so Sawusband had to get a photo for me

It even puffed a scent in the air 

Back to the food

Tile fish with mustard & lime foam

At the end of our meal I asked if we could buy some of the chopsticks as they looked like a pair I used to have that accidentally got broken. they were so lovely that they gave us each a set. 

We had a great time it was a real experience. 

I hope you boys are having fun, I'm sure you are.

Can't wait to hear more of the train escapades!

Have you done anything fancy lately campers?

Who looks like who in the Zoo?

Lucy - Now, we know I have been mistaken from behind as a man... Yes this did actually happen. It was a long time ago when I worked at Ocean Blue Resort (which does not even exist anymore) I was delivering to a room when a porter was Yelling out "Jason, Jason" I was thinking to myself seriously; is he talking to me...I turned around & sure enough, he was! I think we can all guess how that turned out… a little red faced (& that was me).


But as time went on I think the likeness's are getting worse..... I have also been told I looked like Liza Minnelli (we all know how her relationships with Gay men turn out!!!)

So who else do I know that gets look alike comments!

I am apparently random men…or Liza Minnelli

Andrew is Orlando Bloom

Henry has been known to look like the Grinch

Sawusband has a few. There's Matty Johns, Wayne Carey & George W. Bush 

(when he's older)

My mum always says Gusband looks like Luke Mangan

I think that is all, apart from the Divine Miss F who as we know is Cyndi Lauper. 

Who do you look like, Campers?

Andrew – Forget the dog looking like the Grinch, if one more person asks if Gusband and I related I shall scream.

Last Friday night while we were having a drink with AO, we forced ourselves upon the table of an unsuspecting local. As soon as we sat down and the introductions were made, our delightful local asked if Gusband and I were brothers. Our usual shock response is to say, “No we’re lovers.” For some reason we took pity on our companion and rather than embarrass her we simply said no. She kept asking, we kept saying no. Finally Gusband had enough and when she said, “Oh c’mon you have to be twins,” he informed her we were partners. There’s really nothing more uncomfortable than watching a middle aged woman become so embarrassed she becomes speechless.

Gusband and I often get asked, by people who don’t know us, if we are related. Scary really. Gross and a little bit scary. Maybe we have become like those people who start to look like their pets.

Not to mention the lady at the bank who still asks about, “that girl that must be your sister because you look so alike.” It’s because we have the same hair.

I also remember a time at university when a guy in my dorm saw a photo of my beautiful sister and asked me why I was wearing a dress. Not to mention my Godmother who thinks Sawusband looks like Wayne Carey.

Perhaps I am the person who looks like everyone and noone. Perhaps I’m like that lizard who can look like his surroundings.

You think I look like Orlando don't you campers? xx

After a Few Technical Difficulties.. We Are Back With a Hairy Post

Andrew – The other day I took myself off for a haircut. I’m going to a wedding next weekend and I needed a tidy up without having that “I’ve just had my hair cut” look. Ok yes I am anal.

Up until a few years ago I’ve been having my hair cut by the same hairdresser. Miss F has however decided not to be involved with our “hairs” anymore and has moved onto tending to the sick.

Miss F and I had a rocky start…. Gusband and I were living above the saloon she was working in and Gusband had taken his head in to get a trim. “You have to go and see this new hairdresser downstairs,” he gushed, “she’s fabulous. Just moved up here from Sydney, oh you will love her!” Oh how gay.

Appointment made and off I trotted to my new fabulous hairdresser (my previous hairdresser was still trying to convince me I should get foils …again.) As I sat down she began the small talk they must teach at hairdresser school. “Oh so you are Gusband’s boyfriend! Oh so you own the blah blah and have the blah blah with the blah blah.”

“Ah no that would be Gusband’s previous boyfriend,”

“Oh Sorry.”

“Mmmmmm.”

I persevered (mainly due to the fact that my hair had never been cut so well in it’s whole existence) and Miss F and I remain firm friends to this day. So it was a very sad day when Gusband and I had to go in search of a new hairdresser.

The beginning of todays hairdressing experience was almost identical to the ones I’ve had with Miss F over the years.

“So what are we doing with your hair today?”

“Oh whatever, I think if I can get it a bit longer that would be good, I'm quite fancying myself with a bit of length -  just a tidy up.”

A photo of a photo of me with long hairs

“Ok so we won’t be doing that, I think it’s long enough and would look good like this….snip snip.”

Lucky I wasn’t dying to look like Orlando Bloom! I still feel one day I’ll get there but today it wasn’t meant to be. I love a woman who takes charge. At least it didn’t cost me $220 like the time I had it cut in Covent Garden in London – and that was just so Gusband could be rid of me because I was whinging about shopping.

How I like to think I'll look

Gusband & I after a haircut from Lucy

Of course I love my new haircut but I know tomorrow I won’t be able to do it and it will end up looking like it always does. I’ll try campers but this weather isn’t helping! xx

Lucy – Well I guess that’s the long & the short of it!!! Ha-ha

But seriously, thank god we don’t have to have the chat about that long hairstyle…. I just had a flash forward to you in your late 40’s early 50’s with a slightly greyish tied back ponytail (I do however think that hairstyle must be worn with either double denim & or stonewash jeans)

It is a shame Miss F is not cutting “hairs” anymore. She was the best “hairs” cutter this side of the Mountains. Although she will be better servicing the ill.

As for the haircut I gave Gusband & your nice self in Bali, I think we all know why that career did not come to fruition (evidence pictured above)….

Sorry all, the few technical difficulties were my fault….I deleted everything & could not retrieve it. Thank God we have Andrew the computer guru to fix everything up after I’ve been let loose with it.

If you are Orlando Bloom then the Divine Miss F is Cyndi Lauper, I know of a few times she has been stopped for a photo in the street.(I would have inserted a picture here but that's what started the difficulties in the first place)

Oh & Andrew you will always be the Orlando Bloom look alike to me!

Who do you look like campers?